Nobody Knows the Troubles I’ve Seen

You know, dear reader, that sometimes life blindsides us with such unpleasant maladies that we can’t help but wonder if we’ve done something really terrible to anger the gods. Two weeks ago the gods tested my fortitude, tolerance, and maturity.  My intestinal track was challenged in ways I found unimaginable and produced such a copious outpouring of vile excrement that even I was disgusted.

I fear that sharing this illness may offend some of my more sensitive readers, and for that I apologize, but the severity of that illness  left me weak as a kitten and without a great deal of dignity. Now some of you may be saying, “But Mason, you do have a diaper…why weren’t you wearing that helpful garment?” My answer to you, my well intended but highly naïve readers, is that wearing such a device in this situation would be analogous to catching the ocean’s incoming tide with a bucket.

My poor, inexperienced dad was overwhelmed and sleep deprived from mopping up after me throughout two nights. Mom was flying around the west coast on the corporate jet and not coming home until Friday night, which left only Dad in charge. He realized that a trip to the hospital was necessary since none of the usual treatments were working. After an assessment and a round of the appropriate drugs, yours truly was right as rain.

Since some time has elapsed since I began this entry, I must move forward. Lizzard and I are beginning our preparations for the annual migration to Cape Cod. In years past this has been a cause for joyful anticipation but this year I am feeling a sense of trepidation and concern. Grandma’s new dogs are definitely making me question the wisdom of this journey. Daphne, the Frenchie, is a handful (to state it mildly) and Cecily, the black pug, has serious breathing and jealousy issues. So I know that you, dear reader, are wondering how this will impact yours truly. I, of course, share these same concerns. Since I am in the autumn of my years, a certain amount of respect, deference, and attention is due me and my fear is that it will not be forthcoming in this new environment. Grandma is aware of my needs and wants to be accommodating, but the reality of four dogs and two cats may prove to be insurmountable. I will certainly establish my supremacy quickly and firmly, but Daphne, in her extreme youth and inexperience, is sure to breach my wall of power.

Stay tuned and send positive energy my way.

Respectfully submitted,


Lizzard and I enjoying nature's bounty

The youth in question

Daphne and Cecily together...formidable! Don't be fooled by their sleepy expressions.


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13 responses to “Nobody Knows the Troubles I’ve Seen

  1. kristine dave & JP

    OMG!how could your grandparents DO that to you!??:)
    i hope your tummy is better

  2. sue

    I hope your tummy is better and grandmoms doggies will behave and let you enjoy your tripI must say grandmoms doggies are quite cute

  3. Thank you, I am quite well. We are wishing the same but I fail to see the cuteness you reference.

  4. Mason, all these years you have established such a routine for your summer days.

    You incorporated Lizzie into it when she arrived, yes? Well perhaps this will now be your strength. You and Lizzie should, with the help of your grandfolks, try to maintain your summer days the way you have grown to love them…leisurely walks to the perimeter tress in the mornings, afternoon trips to town with Granddad. Late afternoon boat cruises to pull a trap or two for dinner. Evening dinners with friend and family.

    Perhaps the formidable will of you and Grandma plus Lizzie and GrandDad will set a pace that the little sisters will have no choice but to follow…just sort of, the whole pack is doing this now, and see, you two need to follow along and participate if you want to be part of the family/pack.

    I wish you the best, Mason, and well, if the abundance of estrogen is just insurmountable, you can come take a break out here in Texas where a pug is allowed some peace and open space (that and I have central a/c and a pool with a special entry sloped like a beach so its pug safe).

    Good Luck, my friend.


  5. Madison

    Dearest Mason,

    I was so sorry to hear about your illness. I’m glad you’re feeling better now. Don’t worry about those silly girls…just let them know who’s boss!

    Your devoted friend,

  6. Rosie and Mikey's Mom

    so sorry you were under the weather…but so happy you are back to feeling better! we missed you and you deep insight into the life of a pug. no worries about your upcoming stay on the cape, i’m sure your grandparents will help you work it out…after all, you are their #1 boy!
    all the best to you and lizzie and looking forward to more posts…
    pug hugs,
    carol, rosie and mikey 🙂

  7. Roxy, Blue and Bono

    Hi Mason,

    So sorry to hear that you are not feeling well. 😦 Sounds like your dad had his hands full but did an EXCELLENT job caring for you. You should give him a big sloppy kiss for that. We always look forward to hearing about your summer trips to Cape Cod…take care.

    Your pug fans,
    Roxy, Blue and Bono

  8. Richard,Micah John

    Mason I have had similar tummy problems. I am now on a special diet. Cookies are a no no. We are having fresh green beans for a treat. Try them they are delish. A fellow pug Micah John PS Ezra George, Paris Marie and Tyrone Lee say Hi

  9. Mason,
    Tucker here… I am glad to see you are feeling better… I had a touch of tummy trouble myself last week, very unpleasant… I know how those girls can be, my sister Tootie is just the worst… She gets all the attention… You should see her work a crowd… Uhg… My Mother taught us manners, The Toot could sure use a lesson or two… Good luck my friend…
    Your humble follower,

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