Nobody Knows the Troubles I’ve Seen

You know, dear reader, that sometimes life blindsides us with such unpleasant maladies that we can’t help but wonder if we’ve done something really terrible to anger the gods. Two weeks ago the gods tested my fortitude, tolerance, and maturity.  My intestinal track was challenged in ways I found unimaginable and produced such a copious outpouring of vile excrement that even I was disgusted.

I fear that sharing this illness may offend some of my more sensitive readers, and for that I apologize, but the severity of that illness  left me weak as a kitten and without a great deal of dignity. Now some of you may be saying, “But Mason, you do have a diaper…why weren’t you wearing that helpful garment?” My answer to you, my well intended but highly naïve readers, is that wearing such a device in this situation would be analogous to catching the ocean’s incoming tide with a bucket.

My poor, inexperienced dad was overwhelmed and sleep deprived from mopping up after me throughout two nights. Mom was flying around the west coast on the corporate jet and not coming home until Friday night, which left only Dad in charge. He realized that a trip to the hospital was necessary since none of the usual treatments were working. After an assessment and a round of the appropriate drugs, yours truly was right as rain.

Since some time has elapsed since I began this entry, I must move forward. Lizzard and I are beginning our preparations for the annual migration to Cape Cod. In years past this has been a cause for joyful anticipation but this year I am feeling a sense of trepidation and concern. Grandma’s new dogs are definitely making me question the wisdom of this journey. Daphne, the Frenchie, is a handful (to state it mildly) and Cecily, the black pug, has serious breathing and jealousy issues. So I know that you, dear reader, are wondering how this will impact yours truly. I, of course, share these same concerns. Since I am in the autumn of my years, a certain amount of respect, deference, and attention is due me and my fear is that it will not be forthcoming in this new environment. Grandma is aware of my needs and wants to be accommodating, but the reality of four dogs and two cats may prove to be insurmountable. I will certainly establish my supremacy quickly and firmly, but Daphne, in her extreme youth and inexperience, is sure to breach my wall of power.

Stay tuned and send positive energy my way.

Respectfully submitted,

Mason

Lizzard and I enjoying nature's bounty

The youth in question

Daphne and Cecily together...formidable! Don't be fooled by their sleepy expressions.

Bah Humbug! This Pug Has Had Enough

Well, dear reader, my absence from the blog world indicates nothing more than the arrival of my usual low period preceding the holidays, and this year is worse than usual. Above and beyond my usual despondency is the overwhelming influx of negative energy. And by that I mean, the arrival last Friday of Grandma and Grandpa’s “little bundle of joy” (aka Cecily), or in my view, their “sack of coal.” She arrived wound tighter than a spring, black as pitch, panting wildly and breathing stentoriously…not what I’d call an auspicious beginning. Going out for a walk with her was nearly as challenging as it was with Lizzie on her first night in the city. And then there is the added difficulty of her invisibility at night. I’m afraid that  black pugs just don’t work for yours truly. They seem a breed apart from fawns, the real pugs.

To compound my growing resentment, this female upstart had the unmitigated nerve to attack me in MY HOME during meal preparation! Can you believe that? She was fierce too! You would think that Lizzard would have risen to my defense, but no, in true Lizzard fashion she booked it into the living room, begging not to be involved, and waited out the melee. It is of no concern to me that this Cecily has never been in a city before or that she was uprooted from her kennel and kennel mates just three weeks ago.

I was not sorry to see her leave on Saturday morning. I did, however, require much more than the usual quality time with Mom. She was at work part of the day Saturday but we cuddled a good deal that afternoon.  What she doesn’t understand though, is that I need a lot more from her than ever before. Monday mornings send me into a crashing depression and cause me to behave abysmally. I know she must leave for work and yet knowing that, I still demand more of her. Due to her new job she has even less time than before, which means again, I am receiving the short end of the stick. Further complicating this scenario of misery is my knowing that Grandma and Grandpa now have the new Frenchie (Daphne), in addition to crazy Cecily.

And so, for those of you who have reason to be of good cheer this holiday season, I say “bully for you!” I, for one, only can anticipate a wildly chaotic visit to Grandma and Grandpa’s while a teething Frenchie tears through the house and a black pug who wiggles and snorts, become the center of everyone’s attention.

I finally understand the Grinch.

Respectfully submitted,

Mason

Just look at how comfortable those two females are with MY SPACE!

You can easily guess my mood by my body language. Sign me "down and out in Manhattan."

Alright, here it is…the photo of baby Daphne. Grandma said she wouldn’t post my blog today if I didn’t give her space too. Whatever! (to borrow from lame Lizzie).

The Week in Review, or Never A Dull Moment for Mason

I must combine topics today since my week has been so filled with adventure and I don’t wish to sacrifice one for the telling of the other. It interests me that weeks can go by with little to next to nothing happening and then suddenly one is caught up in a whirlwind of happenings.

On Saturday night we went to Grandma and Grandpa’s friends, who own Chloe (my “affaire de Coeur”), for dinner. Nothing unusual transpired until after dinner. I noticed my darling slipping quietly into her bedroom on, what I assumed was, an errand; however, she did not return to the living room. Thinking she should be checked, I, too, slipped into her bedchamber where I found her lying languidly on her dog bed. I have no idea what possessed me or what impulse sent me in that direction, but I found myself settling in beside her. Someone must have noticed our absence because the next thing I knew, a camera was being clicked, accompanied by a blinding flash of light. Before the paparazzi run wild with this photo and story, I wish you, dear reader, to understand the innocence of this moment. Enough said.

Yesterday, Grandpa had to forego our daily hike around Eagle Pond and so it was just Grandma who took us. This outing is truly the most eagerly anticipated event of our day, but without Grandpa it is not the same. I tried to put on a good face but honestly my heart wasn’t in it. Of course that single-cell excuse of a pug, Lizzie, has no such sensitivity and happily she will trot off with any human who assumes the position of pack leader. But, as you all know, she is a fool and a twit. That aside, I had to literally drag myself along on the trails until Grandma chose a path we’d never explored before. I suddenly became aware of new scenery and scents, and my basic canine curiosity overcame my earlier reluctance. Off we went into the gloaming, stimulated and fearless. Grandma then began muttering out loud that she had no idea where we were and then she picked up the pace. We moved briskly further into uncharted territory. There was not a sound or sight of another human or beast. The further we went, the darker the sky became. I knew Grandma was concerned but I soldiered on, since I had to be the alpha male (read, only male). Finally we came upon a path leading us back into the forest in the direction of the lake. We followed it and eventually came around to our entry/exit point. Neither my energy nor spirits flagged during this Robinson Crusoe-like trek but I was mightily glad to reach home and tuck into a hearty repast!

Respectfully submitted,

Mason

My darling Chloe and I...you can see the innocence of our bed sharing. The media will twist this into something unnatural and sordid.

The thrill of smelling a new tree!

A Pug Looks Back

I guess this time of year everyone takes a look back over the past twelve months and does some personal reflection. A pug is no exception. I’m not the sort of pug who does a lot of wool gathering, however, but this year has been remarkable for many reasons: Lizzie moved in, I had surgery, got a new drug added to my arsenal of medications, spent five months on the Cape, and was forced to wear a sweater due to freezing temperatures in NYC. Now I’m wondering what significance, if any, I can attach to these events? Probably not much (I am a pug, after all) but I do think it is clear that my life is anything but dull. As long as my resilient personality and lust for any edible morsel remain intact, I will greet each day with positive energy and enthusiasm. The good thing is, I really don’t have to worry about the economic crisis, business closures, or unemployment…I leave that stuff to Mom and Dad. I think Lizzard and I are here to take those burdens off their shoulders for a few hours every day…

 

So there you have it, dear reader, deep thoughts from a pug named Mason.

 

I put a couple of photos in because I know you humans love looking at us.

 

Respectfully submitted,

 

Mason

 

Beach reverie

Lizzie's auld lang syne moment