Tag Archives: master

Master of the Moment and Still Leader of the Pack

I must share a small story with you, dear reader, because it illustrates so well the folly of youth and the wisdom of age, which is not to say that I wouldn’t trade any young whipper-snapper his foolish youth for my venerable old age.

As you loyal readers must remember, Lizzie and I have a long-standing relationship with Aaron, Grandma and Grandpa’s UPS driver: he delivers packages to them and biscuits to us. But now there are two new “young-uns” interfering with what has been a perfectly fine arrangement for these past few years. Aaron said that we have to share two biscuits four ways because the number of dogs on his route has increased wildly and he cannot afford to stock so many treats. While that is perfectly understandable since he covers this expense himself, it does cut into the amount I actually get for myself. I am not a mean-spirited pug, as you know,  but I’ve learned that I must look out for yours truly because no one else has such a vested interest!

My tale is pithy but deep. One recent afternoon, Grandpa took all four of us for a walk (we do present quite a sight) and on our return I needed to relieve myself once more. This occurred on our street, right before we turned into our driveway. Knowing I have the homing instincts of a trained pigeon, Grandpa let me off leash and I promptly trotted up to the front door. As he approached with the three females, he told me the door was locked and to come in back with him. I, however, had already spied the UPS packages on the front stoop and was not going to budge, since I knew there would be two cookies resting on top of them. The silly little girls went obligingly off with Grandpa while I sorted out Aaron’s offering. By the time Grandpa and the girls came into the house and unlocked the front door, I had consumed both cookies and was wagging my tail enthusiastically. The three were none the wiser, not being the seasoned veteran that I am, and just welcomed me in as the long-lost final member of the pack.

I swear to you, biscuits have never tasted quite this good. Lesson: don’t assume that old age equals loss of mental acuity.

Respectfully submitted,

Mason

At the helm again, in control, master of my domain!

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Who Knew The Old Girl Had It In Her

Just when you think you know all there is to know about a certain creature, you discover there are facets you’ve missed. I refer, in this case, to the much-maligned Lizzie (maligned by yours truly). I must admit that after the event I am about to describe, I have a new found respect for this seemingly innocuous little pug bitch.

 We were returning from our walk Friday afternoon and had just made the turn onto Clinton Street when a woman coming toward us called out, “Your little dog has a chicken bone in its mouth!” Mom looked down and saw her angelic Lizzie, proudly trotting along with a Buffalo chicken wing clamped tightly in her jaw. Mom immediately shouted, “Lizzie!” And in true Lizzard fashion, she opened her little mouth and dropped the bone on the sidewalk.

While I applaud her cunning and deceitful acquisition technique, I disown her drop and release action. I would never, ever give up a tasty treat without a battle of epic proportion. Had she stayed the course, Lizzie would have earned my grudging respect.

 I am, however, becoming increasingly aware of her growing prowess and I am reminded that perhaps the student will surpass her master. She has definite potential if she can learn to develop some backbone and not cave at the first harsh sounding tone of voice.

 Ah, little Lizzie, you have a long way to travel but with patience and my tutelage there is hope.

 Respectfully submitted,

 

This photo says it all...she is weak, I am strong. A submissive pug has no future.

This photo says it all...she is weak, I am strong. A submissive pug has no future.

Mason

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