The old expression, “He’s a glutton for punishment” has no bearing on today’s blog. I have no desire to ever receive punishment and yet my life seems filled with it. And then there are days when quiet, wholly selfish little prayers are answered for no explicable reason, after days and months of wishing and waiting for divine intervention. Such a day occurred recently, and while I feel certain the odds of it recurring are slim to non-existent, I will continue to pray for assistance.
On a typical work evening Dad came home before Mom, walked and fed us, before leaving for a business dinner. He left a note informing her of this and admonished us to be good until Mom came home. What else would we be, I always wonder when given this rhetorical directive? So, when Mom walked in the door, we did our usual dog and pony show of enchanting wiggling, wagging, and whining. Because she likes to feed us before taking us out, she proceeded to ask if we were hungry. What would any self-respecting pug do when faced with that query? We assured her we were starved and waiting patiently to be fed. Dinner number two was exquisite. I could savor leisurely each and every morsel since the edge had been removed from the first sitting. This felt right. I knew at that moment I had ingested the amount of food necessary for a man-pug like me and that all of the previous meals had been merely the appetizer course. I understood finally why I was always feeling such hunger. I had not been given man-pug portions!
It was only after we finished supping that mom discovered her error. Nothing could be done for it and she took us out with a heavy and concerned heart. After she returned from her Yoga class, she found a tick-like Lizzie, fully engorged with her four little legs held aloft, lying in obvious discomfort on her bed. I, however, was ready for another round. And so, dear reader, what is gluttony for one, is hardly so for another. The pleasure I derived from seeing that stuffed little Porky Pig in distress almost equaled the pleasure of consuming a second meal.
Respectfully submitted,
Mason
Two hale and hearty pugs ready to grab scraps outdoors at Epstein's Bar in the Lower East Side.
Look at little Porky, ready to explode, while yours truly remains sleek and supple...unaffected by the additional meal.
A Pug’s Voice – The Next Generation 