A Pug’s Wish List, or “Please Sir, I Want Some More.” (Charles Dickens)

Well, dear reader, it is the time of year when all pugs, whether they be Christian, Jewish, Muslim, or atheist, turn their thoughts to what gifts they would most like to receive. And to that end, I’ve spent my leisure time (read, alone in my apartment) compiling what I believe is a very thoughtful and thorough list of what most pugs honestly desire as gifts.

I’ve consulted with Lizzie briefly because, quite frankly, her wishes are so nauseating that I’ve had to edit out most of them. Here, then, is our ultimate wish list:

1. A steady supply of meaty, moist marrowbones without any imposed restrictions on frequency or location of their consumption. I will growl, snarl, and run away when approached while I am consuming.

2. One night, for just me and my mom…no Lizzie, no Dad…just me, enjoying some snacks and QT (quiet time) with her on the couch, watching TV or napping together.

3. Unlimited time in Grandma’s kitchen, while she prepares a huge feast, tossing me bits of whatever she prepares. Without any interlopers. Just me.

4. A leisurely stroll through Eagle Pond Preserve, where I can take as much time to sniff out interesting odors, wander off the trails, and lift my leg as often as I please without being urged to move forward.

5. An entire day riding around with Grandpa while he does errands that involve treats being doled out at every stop.

6. An excellent bully stick of extraordinary length and width…something a man pug can really sink his teeth into.

7. No salt on the sidewalks so that I am not forced into wearing the dreaded “paw condoms.”

8. Pizza night every night of the week, with the lion’s share going to yours truly.

9. No more toenail trims. Enough said.

10. Receiving treats I’ve never tasted before but will love immediately.

And there you have it…a thoughtful, respectable, and inexpensive wish list for this holiday season from a pug named Mason (and minimally Lizzie).

Respectfully submitted,

Mason

Pleading Pug. How could you not make his holiday wishes come true?

Look at that fool, Lizzie. She has the classic "lights on, nobody's home" look, with all her legs in the air. If you knew her Christmas wishes, you'd shudder.

Advertisements

6 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

6 responses to “A Pug’s Wish List, or “Please Sir, I Want Some More.” (Charles Dickens)

  1. Roxy, Blue and Bono

    Happy Holidays!!!

    Hope you get everything on your list!

    Your pug fans,
    Roxy, Blue and Bono

  2. May all your Christmas wishes come true!

  3. Lexie, Chloe & Coco's Mommy

    I’m sensing a treat-filled theme here! LOL!
    Yes, I can see my girls agreeing with you on this list, Mason, as they too enjoy many a treat. And I hope you get every one you mentioned! I can’t imagine Santa being able to resist such a pleading picture of you!

    (although I’m guessing you’ll still have to put up with nail trims…I don’t really see a way to get out of that one!)

    🙂

    p.s. I, for one, would love to see what Lizzie had on HER list. Maybe she’ll sneak on here and share her ideas with us! *hint hint, Lizzie!*

  4. Hey Mason,

    Have you ever tried kangaroo? Mother let me have some a few weeks ago and I loved it. Perhaps your mom will get you some for your wish #10. Ooooh, ooohhh…how about brushtail? It was in my food last week, and Mother called it ‘exotic’…try that. Although I saw those pics of you and the lobsters and I think you probably dine pretty well as it is.

    Respectfully,

    Wilbur.

  5. Suzanne

    Where do you find the dreaded “paw condoms’?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s